Editor’s Message

No one likes to be exposed to toxic substances. But how about toxic people?

Various relationships can impact our lives and health just as much as food and exercise.

In a study at UCLA, people with negative social experiences had “higher levels of pro-inflammatory proteins which could lead to depression, hypertension, atherosclerosis, coronary heart disease, diabetes, and cancer.”

Translation: You are choosing not to eat sugar because it causes inflammation, but you’re keeping people around you who make you miserable.

I know what you’re thinking — yes, but how can I ditch them, I’ve known them most of my life? Or, but they’re family, I can’t just not see them.

Boundaries are important in people’s lives. Boundaries. Distance. Awareness.

It is possible to detach from people who aren’t good for us - creating a safe distance from a toxic person we still care about without cutting off an appendage or the relationship.

In other words, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. We can limit our time with and our reaction to people. Of course, you have to know which people fall into that category.

A few clues to toxic people: they lie, listen only when it is convenient, hold grudges, are judgmental, don’t like to apologize, manipulate situations and ridicule you, putting down what matters to you.

Everyone has days when they whine or complain more than they would like. All people have days when they are so caught up in their own issues that they overlook what matters to someone else.

But if that is the way a person is the majority of the time, they are toxic, and they can cost you your health if you spend too much time around them.

When a pet is exposed to an essential oil that is dangerous to it, most people see the signs and rush it to the vet to try to save it. When people are exposed too often or for too long to toxic people, society tends to respond that they should just get over it, toughen up, don’t be so sensitive; when in fact, they should rush themselves to a place of help and healing to save themselves.

As young people head out into the world, I hope they carry with them a toolbox of responses and be prepared when others are unkind and set the appropriate boundaries and short strays with people who make them miserable.

May we carry with us our toolbox of responses to be prepared when others are unkind, and may we create boundaries and short stays with people who make us miserable.

If none of that works, just move on and enjoy a happier life without so much poison.